Overheard...

I had to take the boys with me this afternoon to run a few errands. We had two stops to make, and it was that afternoon time when either Ethan turns into a cranky pain-in-the-rear, or Nicholas starts just randomly high pitched screeching, or on my lucky days...BOTH.

Thankfully, I guess since I was expecting the worst, everything went smoothly. Even when we had to wait in line at the tax office for the new license plates on the truck. Wow. That was NiCE! The lady even said how nice they were and gave them each a "s-u-c-k-e-r". Yes, she spelled it for me when asking if it was okay. I think I stared at her for about 10 seconds before my brain caught up with her and went, "oh, yeah! a SUCKER. They'd love one. Thanks!" Duh. I miss my brain. I truly do!

Anyway, the next stop was the movie theatre to buy summer kids passes for $5 which get you in to TEN different movies all summer. Ten movies for $5? You can't even go to one movie for $5. I had bought one for each of us, but then I was rethinking it, and so I was going back for a couple of extras for bringing someone with us. Again, things went smoothly, and we had a pleasant walk in the sunshine over to the other side of the shopping mall. It's outdoors. It's huge. But the day was really nice, and it just wasn't worth parking and carseats and all that again, so we walked.

On the way back, I overheard this lady passing us. She was talking to another lady. I don't know if it was her mother, her sister, her friend, or what. This is what she was saying:
"If I died today...."
(okay, I'm thinking, that sounds interesting...)
"If I died today the thing I would remember about you...."
(Oh, that's sweet. What would she remember?)
"If I died today, the thing I would remember about you would be that sour puckered up look on your face."
(What? Who says something like that? That's not at all where I thought she was going with that sentence!!)

Besides, if she died today, she wouldn't remember ANYTHING!! She'd be DEAD!!

Weird. Just weird.

Head, shoulders, knees & toes....

Last night I was laying in bed with Ethan, trying to get him to go to sleep at a reasonable hour so he doesn't have black eyes from being so tired.
He's fidgety,
flopping around,
kicking the covers,
drumming on his stomach,
conducting music in the air,
making weird noises, etc.

All of a sudden, he turns to me and says,
"Mom, what does shoulder mean?"

ME: This is your shoulder. (Pointing to my shoulder)

Ethan: Oh.

He then proceeds to start singing to himself:
Head.....shoulders......knees and toes....knees and toes.....

And of course he's doing the motions too, touching his head, his shoulders, etc. Except he was singing faster than he could keep up with the right motion to the right body part with the right words. IT WAS HILARIOUS. It was so hard for me to not fall off the bed laughing hysterically, but I somehow managed to keep quiet and just watch. Since I don't have a video, here's the replay:

Ethan singing slowly:
Head (touches head with right hand)
Shoulders (crosses all the way over his own body and touches the shoulder on the far side)
Knees (touches his knees)
and toes (touches his foot)
Knees (touches his knees)
and toes (touches his far shoulder)

Singing a little faster:
Head (touches head)
Shoulders (crosses all the way over his own body and touches the shoulder on the far side)
Knees ( touching knees)
and toes (touches toes)
Knees (touches shoulder)
and toes (touches head)

And faster still:
Head (head)
shoulders (Far shoulder)
Knees (knees)
and toes (toes)
Knees (shoulder)
and toes (knees)

Head (head)
shoulders(knees)
knees (shoulder)
and toes (toes)
Knees (shoulder)
and toes (head)

So, he's singing head, shoulders, knees & toes, but he's TOUCHING:
head, knees, shoulder, toes, shoulder, head!!

Then he rolls over, pulls up the covers, and says,
"Mom, I know what a wedding looks like, but I've never been to a wedding."

Uh-huh. 'cause that's EXACTLY what I'd be thinking .5 seconds after I finished five verses of Head, shoulders, knees and toes!!

My latest concoction...

When I was a kid growing up, my friends and I used the bathroom in our basement to make all kinds of "concoctions". We used to mix everything under the sun together and just thought it was all so cool. I have no idea why that was such awesome fun, but it was. Anyway, tonight's dinner for E.B. brought that to mind.
Joe said, "I'll be SHOCKED if he eats that."
I said, "Watch and see!"

Okay, back up a bit and let me tell you that Ethan needed some allergy medicine because his "nose has buggers in it" which means it's running and itching and driving him crazy. Joe, however, asked him if he wanted some allergy medicine.
"NO!!!"
Joe: Want mom to mix it in some root beer for you? (He was trying to be so helpful!)
Ethan: NO!!!!!
Me: (Crap, now I can't mix it in the root beer, since he probably won't even go near a root beer now even without medicine in it!)

So, I'm starting to fix a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for Ethan, and I think....hmmm...that allergy medicine is grape flavored. It's clear. I wonder if I can sneak it in the sandwich with the jelly? So, I did. And it worked!! At least until the liquid starting spilling over the sides of the bread, and dripping out the middle. Yeah, nothing suspicious about a peanut butter and jelly sandwich that is dripping clear liquid out the middle, right? I hold up the sandwich....drip drip drip. Put it down. Laugh. Listen to Joe say how disgusting that is and how crazy I am to try that.
Then I think, "What the hell." I pull out a new plate that doesn't have allergy medicine dripped all over it. Cut the sandwich into dinosaur halves. Yes, I cut his sandwiches into dinosaurs. It's a $1.50 cutter that I got at walmart that is worth it's weight in gold. They love it, even though the blobs that come out don't look like dinosaurs to me! ) Hand the dino sandwich to Ethan with a glass of milk. The result? 3 minutes later...an empty plate! WOO-HOO!!
Me: Ethan, show daddy your plate!!
Ethan: Look dad, I ate all my dinner!
Joe: Your mom is crazy.
Me: Ethan you know what? I just gave you your allergy medicine!
Ethan: What? No you didn't.
Me: Yep. I waved my magic wand and got the medicine in you!
Ethan: That's not real.
Me: I used my magic mommy wand!
Ethan: The one that's invisible? I NEVER see that one!!!

Hey, I try really hard not to lie to my kids, but sometimes you need to keep a few secrets (for now) and use a little mommy's magic wand!

A picture's worth a thousand words...

Yesterday's "Nature Walk"...can't believe this is in the middle of the metroplex!

ETHAN made this with his Lego Mosaics:
(I call it Pinoccchio Penguin)


and this is his other version: "Alien Penguin"



And this is Ethan playing his new, most FAVORITE game ever. Spongebob? No. Dora? No. Thomas the Train? No. Not my kid. HIS favorite game is a bunch of math problems called "Math Missions!". His teacher was cracking up that I ordered it from the bookorder and she knew he was so excited about it! (That's her solution whenever he gets upset about something. Just pull out some math and he's instantly happy!)


And finally, I didn't get a picture of this because Joe had to take the camera to work, but when Ethan pulled out his T-shirt and shorts last night to wear to school today, this is what he picked out:
On top, a LONG SLEEVE (it's 85 and MUGGY here) olive green t-shirt that is small enough that the sleeves only come to his elbows. On the bottom (this is the hysterical part) : A pair of bright green and blue PLAID BOXER SHORTS that he pulled out of his underwear drawer instead of his shorts drawer.
You know, it crossed my mind to let him wear that (at least long enough to take a picture!) but then I decided I'm not THAT mean a mommy! He's going to be humiliated enough by this blog when he's 15. I can spare him one humiliating photo. (But I still BLOGGED it!! ) LOL...

I know what we can name it..

So, how do you know when you really need to step it up and lose some weight? When no less than SIX different people ask you in one week if you're planning on having a third one. Even Ethan is in on it, telling me about five times that he wishes we had lots of kids.

Me: You mean lots of brothers and sisters?
Ethan: Yeah!!! I wish we had twenty hundred kids! THAT would be AWESOME!!"
Me: (Feeling faint at just the thought!)

And later:
Ethan: Mom, mom!! I know what we can call him?
Me: Huh? Call what?
Ethan: I know what we can call HIM!!
Me: Who?
Ethan: You know, if you have another one, and it comes out of your tummy?
Me: (Like Alien?) You mean another baby?
Ethan: Yeah!! I know what we can call him. Cause we can call him anything we want, right?
Me: Yes, we could call him anything we want. (But we're not, 'cause we're DONE!!) What do you want to call it?
Ethan: Ankle-0-saur!!!!!!!!! That's would be awesome!!
Me: (Um, yeah. And that would prove my point that I'd have no brain left if I had another baby. What's your child's name, ma'am? Ankle-o-saur Acker? Um, I don't think I heard you right. Could you say that again?)

Why I moved to iLOVEyouBUTyoureDRIVINGmeCRAZY!!

Well, I've been informed by my very hip future SIL that I need to move my blog off of myspace, and put it somewhere that more people can read it. For those of you that have already read the EB and Nick-O Chronicles, hang in there since I'm transferring them all to this blog so they are all in one place. If you're like me, you might read them again and laugh all over. It helps to have the lack of memory that I do (part of the brain cells I lost to the boys while pregnant...) because I will have totally forgotten something they did and then re-read about it and laugh my butt off all over again.

Anyhow, this is the new place to read all about their hilarity and adventures. The title, i LOVE you, but you're driving me CRAZY!! is something that I say to EB occasionally when he is just driving me nuts and I have to somehow tell him so I don't have to yell at him!

I say,
"I LOVE you.................................
.........BUTYOU'REDRIVINGMECRAZY!!"

Then we both laugh and feel better. It's actually been quite awhile since I've said that to him. A couple of weeks ago we were at the store trying to shop in the middle of the afternoon (BAD IDEA....DON'T go to the store with kids in the afternoon. BAAAAADDDDD Idea!! You'd think I'd learn this as many times as I've told myself this, but I continue to torture myself.)

Anyway, little Nick had decided that it was a GREAT time to practice screeching in this high-pitched, better-than-any-girl-could-ever-do scream. ALL THROUGH THE STORE. It was awful, and it was making Ethan and I cringe.

Ethan looks up at me and says,
"Mom, I know what you're going to say to Nick!"
Me: "Huh? What do you mean you know what I'm going to say to Nick?"
Ethan: "You're going to say I LOVE you...........BUTYOUREDRIVINGME CRAZY!!!!"

TRUE....so true!!

Classic Ethan

April 1, 2008 - Tuesday

Classic Ethan Category: Life Ethan comes up to me and tells me that he knows why he’s been getting scared at night in his room. Ethan: Mom, it’s cause my hands aren’t soft. I’m going to wear these new garden gloves to make my hands soft. They feel soft on the inside. Then I won’t get scared. Me: uh, Okay. (Notice the nice coordinating incredible hulk pajama top and dinosaur pj bottoms with the lovely contrasting caterpillar gloves...SOMEBODY call Stacy & Clinton!!) Ethan: Only, I’m still going to be just a little scared, because my feet aren’t soft. Me: Here, put on a pair of my new soft socks. Ethan: Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh.......THAT’s better!!

I know why it rains....

March 28, 2008 - Friday

I know why it rains.... Category: Life Sometimes the best stuff comes out of Ethan’s mouth as we’re laying in bed trying to get him to go to sleep. Ethan: Mom! I know why it rains! Me: Why? Ethan: (So seriously!) The clouds are crying because their mom sended them to their room and they are sad so they cry and the rain falls down. Me: Really? It rains when the clouds are sad? Ethan: Yeah! And when the clouds are not sad they don’t cry, and it doesn’t rain!!! ************************************************** And on the Nicko side: Yesterday I put him in the truck to pick up Ethan from school, but decided to do it without his putting on his shoes, since we were coming right back home. We get halfway down the road, and from the back seat I hear: "Oh-Nooo! Shoe, shoe. Sock, sock." Too funny! I can’t just hear his brain thinking, oh no! We forgot my shoes!! Then, last night, I handed him a wipe to wash the oreos off his face, and his said his little baby "hannnnkk hooo" for Thank you and swiped his face with it! I am so loving that he is talking so much!! His other new favorite words at the moment are Awesome! and O-kay!

Overheard...

March 27, 2008 - Thursday

Overheard... Category: Life I overheard this last night while I was in the garage trying to fix the sprinkler timer which keeps freaking out and turning itself back on with six hour run time. Grrr... This is a back and forth type of song that he was singing to himself: Ethan: There’s a party in my tummy (oh yeah, oh yeah) There’s a party in my tummy ( it’s yummy, it’s yummy) There’s a party in my tummy ( it’s yummy, it’s yummy) Are the carrots there? (THey’re yummy, they’re yummy) Are the green beans there? (Oh yeah, so yummy) There’s a party in my tummy, ( so yummy, so yummy) I was just cracking up. He was just over behind me quietly but very enthusiastically singing this to himself!!

Karate

March 12, 2008 - Wednesday

Karate Category: Life Ethan: Even I know karate! I took karate classes and learned how. Me: You did? When? Ethan: Um....at my farm, my killer whale teached me. He lives under the water all the time and holds his breath. He’s even under water all night long. Then in the morning he comes up and teaches me karate! That’s how I know karate. ( a killer whale karate instructor and a t-rex chef. This is turning into the makings of a great children’s book!!) ********************************************* Ethan: Mom, I don’t have my birthday present for you here. You know that guy at my farm that cooks all the time? Me: Your t-rex? Ethan: Yep, that’s him. He made you a chocolate teddy bear for your birthday for me, but it’s at my farm so I can’t give it to you. Me: Oh! Thank you! I love chocolate teddy bears!!

In my eye!!

March 9, 2008 - Sunday

In my eye!! Category: Life Ethan: Hey mom, I need to tell you somefin. Me: What? Ethan: I recorded Wow Wow Wubbzy. (yes, that's really a show he watches) Me: Um...okay (and that's interesting since you don't have a DVR in your room) Ethan: I recorded it in my EYE!! Now I can take it with me and watch it at SCHOOL!!!

Again with the TRex....

March 8, 2008 - Saturday

Again with the TRex.... Category: Life Again today we had a conversation abou the T-Rex that lives at Ethan's farm and apparently does all the cooking. Ethan: Mom, you know my T-rex that lives at my farm that cooks the tomato soup? Me: Yeah. Ethan: He's a really really good cook. You know how he gots to be a really good cook? He took a cooking class! He even knows how to BATTLE COOK!!!!! (You know, like on Iron Chef....with the secret ingredient and then they call it the octopus battle, or whatever. That's one of Ethan's favorite shows. He just loves it, and I can't figure out why. He makes me record it for him, and when he misses the beginning, he will watch it all the way to the end, and then restart it to see what he missed. It cracks me up. And he asks me 20,000 questions if I sit and watch it with him.) So, the conversation continues about how T-Rex can no doubt cook better than I can, and how he is SUPER good. Ethan: My T-Rex can cook anything. He is SUPER good. He can battle cook and beat ANYBODY! He can even beat Bobby FLAME!! (LOL....I am cracking up that he thinks Iron Chef Bobby Flay is named Bobby FLAME!!)

I’m making spiced cake...

March 7, 2008 - Friday

I’m making spiced cake... Category: Life Ethan is playing his new Ratatouille video game on his leapster. Me: What are you doing? Ethan: I'm making spiced cake. See? He puts it in the pan and then it's spiced cake! I like spiced cake!! Me: You do? Ethan: Yep! Me: Would you like to make some spice cake for real sometime? Ethan: Yep. I had it before. At my farm. Me: You did? Ethan: I didn't make spice cake at my farm. My T-REX made it! He know hows to dooz that. He makes it good. Me: Oh. Ethan: You know how I love tomato soup? Even my T-Rex makes tomato soup too! He makes a lot of cans of tomato soup. You know why my T-Rex makes a lot of tomato soup of tomato soup cans? Cause he has to sale it to the store! I tasted it. It was good cause my tongue was in it.

If I were you.....

If I were you.....
Category: Life

Well, I'll start with Nick this time......

Yesterday, we were getting ready to go pick up Ethan from school, and we were getting Nick dressed and ready to go. I had Nick up on my hip, and I was looking in the playroom for his shoes. Nick looks down, see a shoe, and looks back at me and said, "shoe, shoe mama?" I love that he's really talking now!

His other thing since this weekend is all about his new favorite show....Blue's clues.
Nick: A kwoo, a kwoo!!
Me, Daddy or Ethan: A clue?
Nick: (looking around)Way-yah?? ('Where?' in his baby boston accent)
Us: Where?
Nick: (pointing) THERE!!
Repeat endlessly all day long in between outbursts of :
YI-YI-YO!! (E-I-E-I-O)
kwa, kwa, kwa, kwa (quack quack quack)
YI-YI-YO!!
---AND---
Twickle, twickle stah, (Twinkle twinkle little star....)
how i wubba what wa wa
Twickle twickle stah!! (Again, in the baby boston accent....)

As for Ethan...
Ethan: Mom, you're sick?
Me: Yeah. I have a cold.
Ethan: Mom, if I were you............. I wouldn't be sick!
Me: (Hmmm....yeah if it were only that easy!!)

6 years ago

March 6, 2008 - Thursday

6 years ago Category: Life Yesterday was Ethan's birthday. We got up extra early and went out to breakfast before we dropped him off at school. While I was helping him get dressed, this was our conversation: Me:Do you know what happened six years ago today? Ethan: No. Me: I got to be a mommy for the first time! Ethan: (looking at me like I'm off my rocker...) MOM!! You already AM a mommy!! Me: Not always. Before I had you I wasn't a mommy yet, I was just a regular lady. Ethan: Huh. (And then...) Ooooh! I forgot-ted that.

OLD myspace comment:

Ha! that so cute. I often forgot-ted that my mom wasn't a mom at some point. so weird.
anyway, HAPPY BIRTHDAY ETHAN!!!!

Posted by megan on March 6, 2008 - Thursday at 11:38 AM

Mama.....

March 4, 2008 - Tuesday

Mama..... Category: Life Mama, I just took off Nicko's tray....... and took him out......... and put him in the play room.... all by myself............ .............................without hurting him!!!!!! ( Huge smile!)

is it?

February 28, 2008 - Thursday

is it? Category: Life Me: We're having giant pizza rolls for lunch. Ethan: Are they even giant-er than the small ones?? Me: Yep, they're even gianter. Ethan: That's IMPOSSIBLE!!! Joe: (looking at this picture of Ethan with his Valentine stuff): Joe: Who the hell is THAT?? Me: That's your son!

Chicken Little Practice

February 23, 2008 - Saturday

Chicken little practice

I was informed this morning that today I needed to do my Chicken Little practice, so I could play videos with Ethan. Once I sat down with him to do my "practice" this is what happened:

(Note the guitar playing fingers and headbanging during the opening song....)

Huh...That’s weird!!

Huh...That’s weird!!
Category: Life

Ethan: MOM!! Where was you?
Me: (You mean for the whole 90 seconds I was out of sight?) I was on the moon.
Ethan: Which room was you in?
Me: I was on the MOON.
Ethan: Oh. How'd you get down here so quickly? (Not disbelief, not laughter, not why were you on the moon, not you're crazy mom, just... how'd you get back so fast?)
Me: How do you think I got back down here?
Ethan: A rocketship?
Me: Nope.
Ethan: A airplane?
Me: No
Ethan: An umbrella??
Me: Yep, I came back on an umbrella.
Ethan: That's how you got here so fast, on an umbrella???
Me: Yep.
Ethan: Huh. THAT's weird!




OLD Myspace comment:

oh yeah... that's weird part. love that kid.

Posted by megan on February 23, 2008 - Saturday at 4:58 PM

just a quickie

February 22, 2008 - Friday

just a quickie Category: Life Okay, I'm really in the middle of cleaning the bathroom, and I really need to get that actually DONE, so this is just a quickie, and I'll post a LOT more later, BUT We stopped at the video store on the way home today and Ethan got one of the freebie kids movies...Scooby Doo and the reluctant werewolf. He's watching it, and as I walk by he says, Mom, what do those words say? Me: Hmmm? I don't know honey. That's in French. Has it been in French the whole time? Ethan: No. Me: Okay. (That's weird that the bad guys are speaking French, but whatever...) AT LEAST 30 minutes later..... I walk by again, and notice they are still speaking French, with the subtitles at the bottom. So it's not just the bad guys, it's the whole darn movie. IN FRENCH!! And Ethan has been sitting here for the last hour and 20 minutes watching it without interruption! I am really not such a big Scooby Doo fan, but I have to say, Scooby and Shaggy are pretty funny in French! ( Mind you I don't speak any French, so that helps!! :) AND.... as I'm sitting here typing, not having said a word to Ethan, he suddenly picks up the controller, pushes a button, and says "Now that's better.... IT just needed to be on number 1! Now that's better." And now they are magically speaking English with spanish subtitles at the bottom of the screen! I am cracking up!!

You’re a genius...

February 17, 2008 - Sunday

You’re a genius... Category: Life Me: Tomorrow we might go to the park if it's nice out. Ethan: No we didn't. Me: TOMORROW, we might go to the park if it's nice out. Ethan: Oh. And if it's not nice out we won't go to the park. Me: You're a genius. Ethan: No, I'm not. I don't know what 300 plus 3 is!

OLD myspace comment:

When I need a moment of laughter, I come to read your blog! Hilarious!!! I love it.

Posted by Christina on February 21, 2008 - Thursday at 10:51 AM

Maybe you’ve had too many....

February 17, 2008 - Sunday

Maybe you’ve had too many.... Category: Life Last night, we got out the new (to us) ping pong table and got it set up for the first time. Ethan played a bit with Joe, and absolutely loves it. He's not bad, either. Just a little short for the table! So, after dinner, I finally had a chance to play. If you ever want to laugh until your sides hurt, come and watch me play ping-pong. I LOVE it!! It's so much fun. I, however, am spectacularly HORRIBLE at it! I'm so bad I make myself laugh at me! Really, I laughed until my stomach hurt last night! Somehow, if the ball goes to my right AT ALL, there is this blindspot in my brain. I swear, there is just a hole of nothingness, and if I have to reach over there with the paddle to try and hit the ball, I am always confused. I can't tell where I need the paddle to be, I can't tell where the ball is going to be, I can't swing the paddle and try to hit the ball, I end up (EVERY darn TIME!!!) just blindly reaching out to a spot that is not even close, holding the paddle in that spot, cringing, and waiting for the ball to COME and hit the paddle. It's really funny to watch, I'm sure, because I really can't do more than that. If the balls comes in front of me, or to the left, I'm fine, and I can usually hit it (sometimes wildly into the ceiling, the light, or some other crazy spot), but at least I can usually hit it. So, it goes like this: Ping-pong-ping-pong-ping- CRINGE and let the ball go by. WHAT is up with that? Well, Ethan, the expert advice giver, was watching Joe try to teach me how to play, and just couldn't quit talking. Mom, do this. Mom, you have to do that. Meanwhile, Joe is explaining all the 17 different rules in scoring the game, and keeps telling me that you play it like tennis. I'VE NEVER PLAYED TENNIS! Really, honey, when in the last 12 years have you ever seen me play or watch tennis? Seriously, he did a really good job explaining it to me, and being patient with having to start a new serve every 2.4 seconds, but it was REALLY hard to concentrate with Ethan yabbering away on the sidelines too. Eventually, after about a half dozen times of me just cringing and letting the ball go by to the right, I was explaining the "black hole" to Joe and laughing at myself. Ethan offered up this priceless explanation: Ethan: Mommy I think you've had too many drinks! Joe: Did you hear that? He said you've had too much to drink! (We're both laughing because I really am playing as bad as if I'd had too much to drink!) Me: Yeah, I've had too many sweet teas! LOL That's not what he said though.Say it again, Ethan. Ethan: I said Mommy you've had too many DREAMS!! That's why you can't play so well! So I guess that's the kid version of you've had too much to drink?? Priceless!!

OLD MYspace comment:

How fun!! My husband is like a regular Forest Gump at Ping Pong! When he tried to teach me, he said the SAME THING about tennis. When in my life have I EVER played tennis???
I did crack up at the "black hole" in the brain. I have that too!

Posted by Christina on February 21, 2008 - Thursday at 10:51 AM

Do you ever wonder...

February 13, 2008 - Wednesday

Do you ever wonder... Category: Life Do you ever wonder about things just as you're ready to fall asleep at night? These are the strange questions Ethan wanted answered as we were falling asleep last night: "Mom, do flies bite people?" "What about ladybugs? Do ladybugs bite people?" "Why are there stinger bugs (wasps, etc) in Texas?" "Mom, what are dogs afraid of?"

That’s the bestest...

February 12, 2008 - Tuesday

That’s the bestest... Category: Life We were reading bedtime stories last night, and Ethan chose An Underwater Alphabet. We get to the F page..... "F is for Four Eyed Butterfly Fish" and Ethan cracks up! "Mommy!! That's the bestest fish I never hear-ed of!!" Needless to say I cracked up over that! I was laughing so much that he put his hand over my mouth and said, "mommy, don't laugh so much!!" I always kiss him and tell him thank you for making me laugh, which makes him smile. Before that when I was giving the boys their baths, Ethan was talking about how he could do something or other that Nick couldn't do. "I can do that because I'm 5-er than Nick. You know, like I'm long-ER than Nick, that means I'm more long than him. I'm 5-er than him too!" Can't fault his logic on that one. He IS more 5 (older) than Nick. Not his fault English doesn't always follow the rules!

OLD Myspace comment:

If he only knew how many other people "laugh so much!" :)

Posted by Christina on February 21, 2008 - Thursday at 10:53 AM

You’re taking a movie.....of what?

February 8, 2008 - Friday

You’re taking a movie.....of what?

Ethan may not like jumping in the leaves with the dog, but they do enjoy this together:

(Trying to eat the water coming out of the sprinkler)



Yes, it was almost 80 again today!


Oh, and at bedtime/storytime Ethan pointed to a map and said:
"My new grandma lives here (in Georgia) and I'm from here (Nevada) and my little brother lives here (Mexico). My brother didn't DIE!! He's here now (nevada) with me!!"

Slightly disturbing, right?

How is it that...

February 7, 2008 - Thursday

How is it that...

Warning: This may make laugh until you cry or pee your pants (or both!)

But first.....How is it that guys can spending hours in the bathroom, making their own stinky messes (with the heater on to make the smell worse) and then have this reaction to a little tiny diaper?

What doesn’t belong?

February 6, 2008 - Wednesday

What doesn’t belong? Category: Life This afternoon I opened the dishwasher, and realized that after I ran it last night, I had started to fill it again with more dirty dishes. Yeah (Happy Dance!) That means I don't have to unload it right now! So, I start to pile in more dirty dishes, silverware, etc that those pesky dirty dish elves left all over my kitchen today. Those nasty little elves just love to visit and make a mess when I'm not looking, and to top it off, the "Dish Fairy" (you know, the one who sneaks in and DOES the dishes for you when you're not looking) well, the Dish Fairy either A) Doesn't have our new address, or B) is not legally allowed to cross state lines. I'm not sure which, but she never comes around anymore! So, I'm loading stuff in, toss a spoon in the silverware caddy, and do a double take. Now, what doesn't belong here? Yep, that is a full size, partially eaten carrot right along with the spoons and forks! Well, I think, how did that get there? My first thought is that I'm losing my mind again. Did I really put a CARROT in the silverware caddy? Then I think, okay, I'm really losing it. That's Baaadddd!!! WAIT! Maybe it wasn't me. But who EVER puts stuff in the dishwasher? Hmmmm.....well, let's ask anyway, on the .00008 percent chance that I'm NOT losing my mind. Me: Ethan, did you clean up your dinner stuff last night? Ethan: Yep! Me: Did you put it in the sink or the dishwasher? (Please, please, please say the dishwasher, even though you've never put dirty dishes in there after dinner, EVER in your little life!) Ethan: The dishwasher! (With a big grin like aren't you so proud of me?!!!) Me: Hey, GREAT JOB!!! (Woo-hoo!! I'm not a total nutcase!) Way to go buddy! Thanks for helping! Ethan: (Just smiles and goes back to playing games...) I'll tell him when he's older about the time he put a carrot in the dishwasher and made me think I was crazy!!! :)

Ethan hates it, but the dog loves it.....

February 5, 2008 - Tuesday

Ethan hates it, but the dog loves it.....

So Ethan hates playing in the leaves, and always has (sad since we have 5 dozen trees worth of leaves in the yard...) BUT the dog LOVES it!

Going to school

February 3, 2008 - Sunday

Going to school Category: Life I scored big points on the cool mom scale for this one: We were getting ready to leave for school one morning, and it was too cold to walk, so I told Ethan I'd have to take him in the truck. Ethan: Mom, who used to take you to school when you were a little girl? Me: Grandma. Ethan: (in AWE) You used to live at GRANDMA'S???? Me; (LMAO) yes, honey, Grandma's my mom, remember? Ethan: (I could see him do a mental head slap)- Uh.....Oh yeah. I forgot-ted that. LOL.....I love that kid!!

What does this spell?

February 2, 2008 - Saturday

What does this spell? Category: Life Ethan: Mom, what does this spell? ( EhaKLOJGLOG) I wrote this when I was four. What does it say? Mom: I don't think it spells anything. It's just a bunch of letters. Ethan: No, it's a word. Me: Well, it's not an English word then. It must be an 'Ethan' word. Ethan: Yep. That's it. I wrote it in "I-grad-ios". That's what I write in. Me: That's your language that you write in? Ethan: Yep. I write in "I-grad-ios". That's my language. See, haven't I always said he has his own language? Now I'll just have to remember to call it "I-grad-ios" instead of Ethan-ese!!

Cool prizes

January 31, 2008 - Thursday

Cool prizes Category: Life So, I open up Ethan's daily folder from school on Tuesday and find this HUGE stuffed envelope, along with a note from the school. Dear Parent, This is our ONE and ONLY fundraiser for the year. Please support the school by taking orders for magazine subscriptions and renewals. (oh...really....one and only fundraiser...so what was all that crap I ordered in October for? Was that just an inside joke? Here, let's send home these catalogs and see which silly parent buys the most junk. And yes, it's ALL junk. I've seen it go through my classroom when I was teaching. The stuff that goes home is so cheesy and tacky it barely resembles what was advertised in the order catalog. Hmmm.....can you tell I HATE fundraisers? Anyway... The letter goes on to say that students are supposed to fill out these postcards with addresses of people they know to ask them to renew or order a magazine. Turn in at least 7 different postcards completed, and you get a prize. Then there are actual catalogs and order forms that we're supposed to send around too and get people to place orders. Then the order forms are turned in to the school. "Turn in days are Tuesday, Thursday, and the following Tuesday." What? What do you mean turn in days are only on Tuesdays and Thursdays? You're telling me you won't accept them on Monday, Wednesday, or Friday? And why 3 different deadlines to turn in orders? THIS is STUPID! It's DUMB! RIDICULOUS! Do you see why I hate these things? So needless to say, I'm not taking orders. I'd rather just make a donation to the PTA directly. Let's see...I would have ordered a magazine for $20, and the school would have gotten 8 bucks. Yep. That's it. I think I'd rather write a check to the PTA for $20. I did, however, have Ethan fill out the postcards to get his prize, so he wouldn't feel left out. No one has to buy anything, he wins a prize just for completing enough cards. Beyond that, he'd have to sell about 2.4 million dollars in sales to win a cheesy slinky or something (the prizes are even junkier than the junk they sell), so it's not worth it! Of course, the money does go to the school, but then again he's not exactly going to school in the 'hood, is he? :) Well, the next day, Ethan gets in the truck and says he got his prize. What is it? He wouldn't tell me. He was too tired and grumpy. So we just kept on driving to meet some friends to play and have lunch. Well, I found out soon enough anyway.... You want to know what Ethan got as his prize for filling out all the postcards? A "Mosquito Prankster". Yes, this lovely little toy makes annoying buzzing sounds, just like a mosquito. Or, if it falls on the floor of your truck while you are driving down the highway, it sounds like someone honking at you..... Honk......honkhonkhonkhonk.....hooooonnnnnnnkkkkkk!! And the boys were in "sleep mode" of course, Sleep mode looks like this: Aren't you impressed I got such a good picture while driving down the highway? Not really...Megan took that one for me after an equally exciting day of glow in the dark lunar mini golf... So we're driving down the highway being honked at, and I had no idea that this was the cool prize handed out at school. So I'm looking around thinking ????? Who the hell is honking at me? There's nobody even around me!! Honk....honnnnnnkkkk....honkhonk...honk!! Finally it dawns on me that it must be us honking at ourselves (somehow)...LOL...so everytime we hit a bump we got HonK!! HOnnnnnnK!! HOnk... all the way until we got to Chuck E. Cheese....but that's another torture story!!

Random thoughts....

January 26, 2008 - Saturday

Random thoughts.... Category: Life Random Thoughts, by Jack Handey. Ooops, I mean, by E.B. the 5 year old.... I figured out how to use the voice record function on my phone. (Much easier than trying to remember and write it all down!) This is what I got today: Ethan: Mom, do you know what pet I had-ded? Me: What pet did you have? Ethan: I had-ded a horse! It was a baby horse, and I fed him milk! And when he got to a grown up I told him to do somefing, and he LISTENED, 'cause he didn't have anything in his ear. He had nothing. Me: He had nothing? Ethan: On his ear? He had nothing on his ear. (I wonder if he's thinking headphones, like the kid with headphones on who just ran out in the street in front of our truck?) He listened, and he was good. He was good to me. He was listening. And I liked him. Me: What kind of a horse was he? Ethan: Ummmm......I didn't know. He was a grown up horse...... I think........oh yeah, he's NOT a dino horse!!!! That would be a bad one! ************************************************ ETHAN: I can't say my phone number. It's too many numbers. My phone number is: 2- 100,000- 2- 8,000- 300 and a 1,000- 100. That's my phone number. I can't even...I can't even make all those numbers! And 9,000!!!! That's my last phone number. Ethan:And, I had a baby too. Me: You had a baby? When did you have a baby? Ethan: (Clearly not expecting THAT question) Uh....I don't know when I had a baby. Not a baby that's REAL!!! Me: What kind of baby then? Ethan: (Cleverly changing the subject...) I have 2 pets. I have 3 pets. I have 3 pets. Me: You have 3 pets? Ethan: Yeah. I have a horse, uh..I have not a mouse....... I had-ded a cow, and .........a duck. I have a pond. For my duck! My house is far away. Far, far, far. In North Texas. **Sigh**...You know what my number on my house is? 2992. Me: (hmm...maybe we need to work on our address and phone again!) Is that the number on your house at your farm? Ethan: Yeah. The farm is....I have a farm in my house. Not in my house.... I have a farm at my backyard. Even I have a ocean. My yard is HUUUUUUUUGGGGGGEEEEEEEE. My yard is huge. Me: Your yard is huge? ( I guess it has to be to fit an ocean in the middle of Texas!) Ethan:Yeah! Even I made a beach. Me: You made a beach? Ethan: Yeah, For my killer whale! (oh course! every killer whale needs his own beach, right?) and my shark. And I have NO starfish. Me: No starfish? (Hmm...Wonder if the starfish got voted off the island because of that show he watched yesterday where they were destroying the coral reefs?) Ethan: And I had an octopus! I do! At my house. I'm really serious. You want to see what my back yard huge is? It's this (holding arms all the way apart) huge. It's 100 long.

It's been awhile

January 13, 2008 - Sunday

Ethan: Mom, I'm vaccumming! This is my special way of cleaning these things up!

Now, if you know Ethan at all, or if you've read any of my older blogs, you should be asking yourself WHAT are these things he's trying to clean up??
I'll give you three guesses............

NOPE that's not it............guess again......

Wrong again........one more try.......

No, sorry! That's not it either. GIVE UP?
...
...
...
...
...
...
PEAS. Yes, peas. Ethan is sitting and eating dinner. His special request for dinner was green beans and peas. Nothing else. Just peas and green beans. No taco, no burrito, no pb & J, just veggies. Okay by me. At least it's healthy! (My 5 year old loves broccoli too!)
So he's eating, and I hear this huge slurping sound, so I ask him what he's doing. And I get the "Mom, I'm vaccumming! This is my special way of cleaning these things up! SLURRRRPPPP....." as my answer. And he is actually sucking up peas like a Hoover vaccuum.

O-kay...(guess I need the camera for this one....)


Yes, I know I'm a terrible mother. I should be teaching him better table manners, not taking pictures of him vaccumming up peas. But it was too funny to not get on camera!

I snapped another picture, and it just wasn't getting the full effect. You have to see it and HEAR it too......Sooo........ Here you go. I'm sharing the love. Make sure your volume is on so you get the full effect and don't miss the surprise ending!


Now, I never expected for him to get peas up his nose. How lucky am I to get that on film? How exactly does one suck something up the nose while sucking stuff into the mouth? I didn't think that was physically possible, but of course my EB can do it! :) I'm a terrible mom to think that's so funny too, but it was hilarious. By the way, the peas came right back out of his nose, and that was the end of the pea vaccuumming!

It's been awhile since Ethan has done something TRULY hilarious. This is not quite PANDA video funny, but I was still laughing my butt off!! Bad mommy!




Old myspace comments
ask joe about peanuts in the nose. Or do you know that one??????
Posted by Sooner96 on January 15, 2008 - Tuesday at 1:04 AM

priceless!!! LOVE IT! Posted by Christina on January 25, 2008 - Friday at 1:12 PM

He strikes again

January 8, 2008 - Tuesday

He strikes again Category: Life Okay, the 'upside down art' bandit has struck again....this time in the boys room.... And here he is..........the artist formerly know as "EB":Actually, I do think I remember him telling me that we are all supposed to start calling him "Rex" when he turns six. Get ready everyone! And not to be left out, poor little Nicholas with a fever and ear infections really ate lunch today for the first time in several days. Applesauce, JELLO, and american cheese........YUM-O! Hey, he's happy, right? How long do you think it will be before "Yum-O" ends up on one of those banned words lists?

January Limbo

January 7, 2008 - Monday

A picture is worth a thousand words, right?

Today is JANUARY 7th, 2008:

And here it is LIVE:
(after looking at this again today, maybe I should mention that it was 80 degrees outside, and that I'm not actually aiming the hose AT him. I was too lazy to unhook the hose and move it closer, so I'm trying to reach that evergreen in the background to give it a drink. )
(Sorry these are on here twice....couldn't get the 2nd set deleted!)

Yes, it’s January....

January 5, 2008 - Saturday

Yes, it’s January.... Category: Life Yes, it is January, but this is the song Ethan has been singing for the last 2 days: The first day of Christmas, the da da did to me.....a one... hole.... pear.... tree..... The second day of Christmas the da da did to me.......two turtle dubbs, and a one....hole....pear....tree...... The ferd day of Christmas the da da did to me......three....whole hens, two turtle dubbs, and a one.....hole....pear.....tree..... That's all he "knows". I can't bring myself to tell him he's off a bit....it's too fun to listen to him sing the wrong words all day!

Have a great day!

Friday January 4th, 2008

Have a great day....
Category: Life

It has been too cold in the mornings this week for us to walk to school as usual, so I've been driving Ethan and dropping him off at the school door. He really doesn't like this because I can't/won't walk him all the way into the building, but he's still been good about doing it anyway (at least this week).

So this morning, we pull up, he gives me a hug, and when we get to the front of the line he hops out. This is the goodbye as he went out the door:

Me: Love you.
Ethan: Love you too Mom!
Me: Have a great day!
Ethan: Happy Valentine's Day Mom!

Then he was gone. I'm glad he didn't see me laughing at him! You just never know what he's going to say!!



Old comment from Myspace:

Yay! I love laughing first thing in the morning.
You know... if there was a guarantee that I would have such an awesomely random child, I would consider having a kid.

Posted by megan on January 4, 2008 - Friday at 1:58 PM

Pictionary

January 2, 2008 - Wednesday

Pictionary Category: Life One of Ethan's favorite games is Pictionary, but we never have enough people around to play. We had enough people at Thanksgiving, so we played then. Ethan had his own turns drawing, and this is what he drew for 'front row' which honestly beat the pants off of what I tried to draw for front row!! It is the front row at a movie theater, complete with an emergency exit door!! The other clue he had was "money train". I told him to draw some money and a train. I guess money train didn't make any sense to him, so this is what he drew: It's a MOMMY TRAIN!! It's a mom riding a train. A Mommy Train! I thought that was hilarious. I guess it makes more sense to a 5 year old then a money train! Since he loves the game so much, he got a Disney Pictionary DVD game for Christmas which we played today. Here's what he came up with: Can you guess what it is? It's a campsite! There's Jerame (the person with the J over their head) because Jerame goes to camp, a tent and a tree! Here's another one: DvD of course. Can you guess this one? IT's a lighthouse. The zig zags are "Stairs so you can go up to the top". And finally: This is what he drew for "planet". Specifically he says it's "Mars. Mars is very very brown."